What Sound Describes You in Bed?

By: Ian Fortey
Estimated Completion Time
5 min
What Sound Describes You in Bed?
Image: Martin Novak / Moment / Getty Images

About This Quiz

They say a picture is worth 1,000 words, so you'll have to use your imagination for just a little bit to try to decide how many words can be represented by a single sound. After all, communication isn't solely verbal. As a species, many of us are pretty good at communicating just by giving a look, like when you arch an eyebrow to express your utter disbelief. You can also use your whole body to speak such as when you shrink away from someone trying to offer an unwanted hug. We can do pretty well in life without saying a single word. And then, of course, we can communicate with sounds that still aren't words but offer a wide range of meaning. A simple "pfft" sound represents derision while any number of yummy sounds can express satisfaction or desire. Or maybe even something more intimate.

We can let sounds stand in for all kinds of things. The "Jeopardy" theme is the universal thinking sound. A buzzer can mean "nope!" So, is it a stretch to think a sound could represent how you are in bed? Of course not! There's absolutely a sound out there that represents you in bed. And you can find out what it is if you take the quiz!

"In bed" doesn't have to literally mean "in bed." Where's your favorite non-bed place to get frisky?
Outside
The car
The shower
Could be anywhere, really.
Are you open to trying new things your partner might suggest?
I guess it depends on what we're talking about.
I'm kind of good at what I do, I don't need a lot of change.
Oh, definitely
I love new things!
Do you spend a lot of time making sure your partner is pleased?
I like to make sure we're both happy.
I assume they'll be pleased at the same time as I am.
Definitely
I try to.

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Have you ever been unable to perform for a reason that wasn't physical, like an injury?
Everything tends to work eventually.
Not that I can think of.
Yeah, if we're not into it we're not into it.
Yeah, you need to get in the mood first or it's just not happening.
Would you ever do it on the dining room table?
Why not?
Seems like a bad choice, to be honest.
Would and have!
No thanks.
If you're home for the holidays and the house is full of family, would you risk an encounter with your significant other under the same roof?
I know how to be quiet, so sure.
Not a chance
Absolutely
I'd rather go out.

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Are you the kind of person who'd bring handcuffs into the bedroom?
I definitely am.
Nope, don't need props.
If my partner was down for it, sure.
I guess anything's possible.
Which of these do you consider to be the sexiest food item?
Strawberries
Sausage. Get it?
Whipped cream
Chocolate syrup
Tell us your opinion on one-night stands.
Yes!
I am so down.
If the situation is right, why not?
Not really my thing.

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If you only have 15 minutes before you need to be somewhere, would it be worth it to have a quickie?
I don't think so.
I could work with 15 minutes.
Not enough time.
You bet it is!
Speaking of sounds, what kind of sounds are you producing in the bedroom?
Lots of heavy breathing and such.
Oh, you know. Grunts and such.
I like dirty talk.
I get loud.
Do you have any toys of an adult nature in your home?
Yeah, I have a few.
Don't need 'em.
Sooooo many
Just one

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Are you good at communicating your desires to your partner?
I try my best.
I find it a little awkward sometimes.
I'm very open.
For some things yes, but not for others.
Do you have any fantasies that you have never shared with a partner?
Many
Yeah, one main one.
No, I am willing to share anything with someone I trust.
A couple I was too embarrassed by.
Is sex the most important part of a relationship?
No, but it's up there.
Definitely
Not the most, but it's as important as other parts.
Top 5, at least

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Have you ever tried more than one partner at the same time?
It's happened once or twice.
Heck yeah!
Not yet, but I'd like to.
No
Do you and your partner have one of those lists of celebrity crushes you'd let each other have sex with if the situation ever presented itself?
We made one as a joke once.
No
Nothing formal, but I suppose so.
Never heard of that before.
What would automatically make you swipe right on someone?
A revealing profile pic
If they're DTF.
If we share an obscure interest.
If they're just super hot.

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And what's going to lead to an automatic swipe to the left?
Someone who comes across as rude.
If they seem stuck up.
Someone who seems to support things I hate.
Not to seem shallow, but if they just look unattractive to me.
Do you ever wear sexy outfits to try to turn your partner on?
Yeah, sometimes.
I get naked to turn my partner on.
I have a whole wardrobe of sexy stuff.
Never thought of it before.
Do you feel like you're a romantic at heart?
I like to think so.
Nah, not really
I definitely am.
I'm not the best at romance.

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Can you have a physical relationship with someone you don't love?
Of course, you just need an attraction.
Sometimes it's better if you don't have feelings for them.
It's better if you do love them.
I think so.
What's the first thing you do after sex?
Get a drink.
Nap time!
Cuddle
Shower
Have any of your partners ever complimented you on your technique?
It's been known to happen.
All the time!
No complaints
Not really, but it's not like they hated it.

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Have you ever been inspired to film yourself during some sexy times?
Once or twice
You know it!
Not my cup of tea
Oh, no. I don't think I could do that.
Do you feel any anxiety before having sex with someone for the first time?
Not sure if it's anxiety or excitement.
Not in the least
Tons
I definitely get some flutters.
If you met someone who was gorgeous, funny, intelligent, caring, and interesting but they were terrible in bed, would you stay with them?
Maybe they could practice and get better?
Nope!
It'd be worth staying together, sure.
Hard to say.

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Under ideal circumstances how often would you be having sex?
Daily
A couple of times a day
A few times a week
I can't pick a schedule like that.
Do you feel like you're too preoccupied with sex during your day-to-day life?
Sometimes
I think about it a lot but I'm cool.
No, I'm in control of things.
Not really
Would you ever go to a swinger's club and have sex in front of a crowd of people?
Maybe?
That's my dream.
I don't think I could do that.
Not in a million years.

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