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1. When you visit your grandkids, what presents do you bring?
Candy
A popcorn ball
A coloring book
A book to help your grandkids learn math
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When your grandkids begin playing in the mud, what do you do?
Grab towels to clean them up right away
Laugh
Ignore them
Pull out the hose and make them muddier
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What would you choose to do over watching your grandkids?
Trip to Europe
Trip to Hawaii
Dinner and a movie
Watch someone else’s grandkids
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What do you do when the grandkids spend the night?
Make them watch a movie
Make them go to bed early
Force them to read a book
Play outside
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What do you feed the grandkids for breakfast?
Cookies
You make them a delicious meal
Take them out to a restaurant
You give them popcorn from the previous night’s movie
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Who is your favorite grandkid?
One of the boys
One of the girls
The one who is the quietest
Not particularly fond of any
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How are your grandkids most useful?
Setting the clock on my devices
Deleting my browser history for me
Making me laugh
Choirs
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What makes your grandkids most annoying?
They won’t stop talking
They cry all the time
They won’t go home
They always want to play
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After the grandkids go home, what one device is always missing?
TV remote
The book you’re reading now
$20
Your candy
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When your grandkid does something you’re proud of, you...
Hug them and tell them you are proud
Smile and pat them on the head
Brag to everyone
Say, “Eh, you could have done better.”
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On your grandkid’s birthday, you...
Help prep for the party
Take the grandkids out of the house so their parents can prepare
Show up to the party with a bunch of presents
Mail a card with some money
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When your grandkids turn 21, you...
Say, “well isn’t that nice.”
Buy them their first shot
Get wasted with your grandkid
Start telling stories about how their parents got in trouble at your grandkid’s age
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What’s your favorite TV show?
Wheel of Fortune
Family Feud
Matlock
I can’t watch TV, the grandkids stole my remote
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How do you handle your anger around the grandkids?
I snap and yell
I’m calm and collected
I’m overly nice, but everyone knows I could just snap at any minute—like a clown.
I break down crying
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What do you think of your younger years?
I’m often nostalgic
The best is still to come
I wasted them
I can’t remember them
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Do you have grandkid photos with you all the time?
On my IPhone
Only in a scrap book
I have a couple in my wallet
Nope
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What does your family tease you about the most?
Plastic slipcovers on the furniture
My costume jewelry
Bodily gasses
I don’t know what they are talking about
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When was the last time your grandkids slept the night?
Yesterday
Last week
Within a couple months
Those hellions? Not a chance
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Do you go to your grandkids extracurricular activities?
If I’m invited
If I’m not busy
Always
I live too far away
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Where do you live?
In the same house my kids grew up in
A condo
On a cruise ship
A gated retirement community
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