How Much of a Gentleman Are You?

When hosting a dinner party, how do you arrange seating?

I have people sit on the floor in the dark.

I have people sit wherever they like.

I have people sit with the people they like and know.

I curate introductions, seating by alternating genders when possible.

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When hosting a dinner party, when do you tell your guests to begin eating?

I wait until everything is cold.

I wait until everyone has their food.

I wait until after we say grace.

I tell everyone to eat as soon as they have their meals. Don't be rude to the food!

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When you are a guest at a dinner party, what do you bring with you?

Nothing.

A bottle of wine.

A box of chocolates.

A gift appropriate to the host.

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If you are a guest at a dinner party, when do you arrive?

Whenever I do, or not at all.

A few minutes early.

Exactly on time.

Five to twenty minutes late.

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When you are a guest in someone's home, when do you get up to leave?

When everyone else is gone.

When the party is declared over.

At around 10:00 p.m.

Before everyone else, as the party starts to wind down.

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At dinner, who do you speak to, and in what order?

Everyone, the whole way through. I dominate the conversation.

I speak to whoever is sitting nearby.

I try to speak to both people next to me.

Men, speak to the lady on your left first, then switch at dessert. Ladies, speak to the man on your right first, then switch at dessert.

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How do you use silverware at the dinner table?

I don't.

I use whatever implement seems appropriate.

I use the little forks for salads and the big ones for the main course.

I start on the outside and work inward as the courses go.

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If a subject makes someone uncomfortable, how do you react?

I tell the person to go away.

I give a trigger warning and dive into the subject.

I just change the subject.

I ask if they are uncomfortable and if they are okay with the conversation continuing on its course. If they aren't, I change the subject.

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If someone doesn't contribute to a group conversation for several minutes, what do you do?

I ignore them.

I smile at them and then ignore them.

I ask them a question.

I try to get them engaged by asking for their thoughts at several points in the conversation.

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Do you offer to help clean up your host's home after a dinner party?

Naturally, I want to be hospitable.

Usually, since it can be a lot of work for the host.

Only if there's a big mess to clean up.

Of course not.

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At meals, what do you do with your phone?

I take photos of my food for Instagram, and tweet about the other diners.

I leave it out so I can check my texts.

I leave it in my pocket, with the ringer on.

I turn it to silent and put it away.

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At meetings, what do you do with your phone?

I peruse Facebook and stalk my ex on Instagram.

I leave it on the desk, so I can take notes on it.

I put it away unless I explicitly need it out for the meeting.

If I don't need it for the meeting, I turn it off.

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On dates, what do you do with your phone?

I flip through Tinder under the table.

I leave it on the table.

I leave it on the table, face down.

I put it on vibrate and put it away.

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How do you dress for parties?

However I want. Par-tay!

I keep it casual.

I dress up.

I ask what the host will be wearing and go one notch smarter.

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How do you behave towards your subordinates at work?

My slaves? Ha!

I delegate tasks I don't want to deal with to them.

I delegate appropriate work, so I can gauge their capabilities.

I use work to test them, and I mentor them.

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How do you behave towards your peers at work?

I'm not some kind of fake who pretends to be friendly to everyone.

I treat them like they are my neighbors.

I treat them with respect and keep an appropriate distance.

I keep a respectful distance and try to be helpful when appropriate.

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How do you behave towards your boss at work?

I keep it real.

I treat them like a pal.

I treat them respectfully.

I try to anticipate their needs.

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What do you eat at the movie theater?

Tunafish. It's good for you!

A big bag of crunchy candy.

A tub of popcorn.

Chocolates from a box.

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What do you do with your phone at the movie theater?

I live Tweet the movie or show.

I snap photos for the 'gram.

I put it on vibrate and put it away.

I turn it off and put it away.

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How do you sit at the movie theater?

I spread out.

I try to get comfy.

I get as comfortable as I can without making others uncomfortable.

I try to be comfortable, while not blocking anyone's views or monopolizing the armrest.

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What do you do with your home to prepare for guests?

I live in it.

I straighten up a little bit.

I vacuum.

I vacuum and put away anything like mail, bills, cash, or personal stuff.

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How do you plan a menu when cooking for guests?

I find out who has a special diet and tell them not to come.

I tell everyone what's for dinner and that they can take it or leave it.

I ask who is a vegetarian and have an option for them.

I ask all the guests about their allergies or special diets (religious or otherwise) beforehand and do every reasonable thing to cater to them within the parameters of the invitation.

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When you dress, what do you try to convey with your personal accessories?

My power, success, and sex appeal.

My money and "with-it-ness."

My personality and success.

My personality and elegance; I try to keep it low key.

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How aware of you of interpersonal power dynamics are you when you're in a meeting or at a party?

What is that?

I don't care at all about that.

Somewhat. I try to keep an eye out for people who look excluded.

Very. I try to make it easier for people to speak up when they don't feel like they have any power.

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Is it polite to read a book or magazine when at a table with someone else for anything other than reading?

Sure. A book is a sign of being cultured.

Sometimes. What if it's a bible?

Generally no, but there are exceptions.

Under no exception is it okay.

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Does that extend to cell phone use?

Yes, I can use my phone anywhere I want. That's the whole point of mobile phones.

Yes, I might take a call from a friend or something.

Yes, I will only use it if something important comes up.

Yes, I will leave it in my pocket on vibrate and only check if I get an emergency call from someone.

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When you are on public transport, under what circumstances will you surrender your seat?

For no one! It is my seat! Mine forever!

For kids or really old people with canes and walkers and stuff.

For the elderly, or pregnant, or children.

For an elderly, disabled, or pregnant person.

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When you step onto a train, what is the first thing you do?

Find a nice pole to lean on.

Find a spot without too many people standing in it.

Move away from the door.

Move to the middle of the car.

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When you step onto a train, what is the second thing you do?

I manspread.

I sling my bag over one shoulder.

I take my bag off my back and sling it around my front.

I take off my bag and put it on the floor, between my feet.

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Do you discuss the health problems of friends or family members without their explicit permission?

Sure, I tell everyone. I might meet a good doctor.

Only if it's interesting, like genital warts.

Not unless they're not seeking help and it is life-threatening.

Of course I don't.

FINISH QUIZ

How Much of a Gentleman Are You?

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