Are You a Real "Witch?"

By: Marie Hullett

Are You a Real "Witch?"
Image: D-Keine / E+ / Getty Images

About This Quiz

Witches come in myriad shapes and forms. While you might picture them with pointy hats and black garb, that's just a stereotype—they very well may be the girl-next-door. In fact, you may even be one, too! Famous ones include Morgan le Fay, Sybil Leek, Sabrina Spellman and everyone's favorite Mean Girl, Regina George. To be clear, one can act like a witch on occasion without being a real witch, deep down. So, how do you pick out the real witches? 

It's complicated, but we can do it. By analyzing several aspects of one's life, we can determine the strength of the witchy instinct as well as the capacity to act on it. Concocting the occasional potion or spreading rumors behind people's back does not a witch make, necessarily. Real witches feel genuine passion for their craft, and never a drop of guilt—it's a real talent, if you will. 

So, how much of a witch are you? Do you only dabble in broomsticks and bewitching, or do you live the witch life through-and-through? Do you merely cast revenge on your enemies or truly twist the knife in? The results may surprise you. Now, keep calm, carry a wand and take the following quiz! 

Question 1 Which one of these fictional witches do you most admire?
Hermione Granger
Sabrina Spellman
Maleficent
Grand High Witch of All The World

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Question 2 Do you ever become irritated just looking at someone?
No.
I have before.
Yeah. But they usually have a REALLY annoying face.
Every. Single. Day.

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Question 3 Imagine you're in the award-winning TV series "The Good Place." Do you think you would end up in the Good Place, Bad Place, or Middle Place after death?
Good Place
Middle Place
Honestly, probably the Bad Place. But the people there don't even seem that bad!
The Really, Really Bad Place

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Question 4 Imagine that your day-to-day inner monologue was broadcast to the world. Would you have any friends anymore?
Yes, of course.
I'd maybe get to keep a couple.
Hmm, yikes. Maybe not...
Definitely not, but good riddance. I don't call anyone my friend as it is.

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Question 5 Have you ever acted like you couldn't hear someone so you wouldn't have to respond to them?
No, never.
Not often.
Sometimes.
Yes. I recommend it. It's super effective!

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Question 6 Oh no, your friend just betrayed you. Do you seek revenge?
No, never.
It depends on the gravity of the situation.
Yes.
Absolutely. Where's my voodoo doll?

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Question 7 You're at a restaurant, and the service is super slow. After waiting almost an hour, the server brings the wrong meal. What do you do?
Remain polite as possible. I make mistakes all the time, too.
I'd probably be pretty annoyed, but try not to show it too much.
Get a little angry to see if I can get my food for free.
Destroy them.

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Question 8 How often do you yell in an average week?
I never yell.
Maybe once or less.
Maybe a couple times. I get super angry in traffic.
Every day. So many people deserve to be screamed at, my throat starts to hurt.

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Question 9 Have you ever called a baby ugly?
No!
Once. Guilty.
Yeah, but I mean, in my defense, the baby really was ugly.
Yes, all the time. Most babies are like ugly little aliens! What can I say?

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Question 10 Which one of these words would your friends most likely call you?
Kind
Crafty
Intuitive
Clairvoyant

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Question 11 Do you own a voodoo doll?
No...
I don't know if I believe in it, but I have one. It's a long story.
Yeah.
Yes, several. I also make them for others upon request. Would you like terrorize your enemies?

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Question 12 If you were a "Mean Girls" character, who would you be?
Glenn Coco
Cady Heron
Janis Ian
Regina George

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Question 13 Do you use crystals for healing or purification purposes?
No.
I have a few amethysts and pieces of quartz, stuff like that, but just because they look pretty.
I do.
Yes. I have tons. In fact, you just reminded me that I need to cleanse and energize them with salt and moonlight.

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Question 14 You have the option to choose between world peace or being the ruler of the entire world. Which do you pick?
World peace
I don't know. Are you going to judge me for my answer?
If I was the ruler, maybe I could create world peace...?
Ruler. Duh

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Question 15 What does the majority of your wardrobe look like?
Pastels
Mostly dark colors, like deep violet
Black on black
All black dresses with an assortment of pointy hats

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Question 16 How often do you ghost people?
Never.
I have before.
Pretty often, honestly...
All the time. Saves me the time of making up an excuse.

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Question 17 Time for a tarot reading! Which card did you draw?
The sun
The Moon
Death
The Devil

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Question 18 Pretend that you just heard something hilarious. Would you say that you cackle, or laugh?
Laugh
That's a good question. I hope I don't cackle, but I might.
It depends, but I've been told I cackle.
Cackle

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Question 19 Be honest. How often do you talk behind your friend's or family member's backs?
Never
Not often.
Pretty often. They deserve it.
As long as their backs are turned, I'm talking about them.

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No
Sometimes
Quite often.
All the time. Would you like patchouli, amber, evergreen or dragon's blood today?

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Question 21 Have you ever visited Salem, Massachusetts, the famous site of the Salem witch trials of the 17th century?
Where?
No
Once
Of course. I go often to honor my ancestors.

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Question 22 Have you ever dreamt something that came true?
No, never.
Sort of.
Once
Every night.

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Question 23 Which one of these jobs do you think you would enjoy most?
Secretary
DMV employee
Debt collector
Parking enforcement officer

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Question 24 Which one of these famous artists' wardrobes would you most like to steal?
Taylor Swift's
Lorde's
FKA Twigs'
Stevie Nicks'

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Question 25 Do you concoct magical potions?
No...
I haven't, but maybe I should ... I have a few things I need taken care of.
I have before.
Yes, all the time.

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Question 26 Whether you brew potions or not, if you had to make one, which of these ingredients would you put in it?
Lavender
Nettle
Blessed thistle
The blood of a bat

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Question 27 Have you ever dressed up as a witch for Halloween?
Never
I have before.
Yes, every year.
No, that would be ridiculous, because I am one.

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Question 28 Which best describes your personal moral stance?
Treat others how you would like to be treated.
Honesty is the best policy.
What people don't know can't hurt them.
Look out for yourself and no one else.

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Question 29 Time for a picnic! Which one of these places sounds most ideal to break out the baguette?
The beach
A park
In a forest under the light of the full moon.
A cemetery

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Question 30 Some people are masters of insults and comebacks. So, how sharp is your tongue?
Dull as a butter-knife
Kind of blunt
Pretty sharp
Razor-sharp

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You Got: